♥5.18.2011♥
Haha oh my gosh it's been ages and ages since I last posted anything.
Today's a really special night (: I don't know there's just this cool atmlsphere! I don't know if it's because I'm listening to the song "Jar of hearts" but tonight just feels kinda... different. Haha I just realised that any night that I actually do post has to be a special night cos usually I don't blog...!
If I could choose to sum up the whole of this year in one word so far, I think it would just be , "tiring" This year... I know that Sec two to Sec three is a huge transition but I just never thought that it would be this hard. Everything's changing, everyone's changing. Why can't things just stay the same throughout...?
Oh no! Why do my blog posts always sound so emo D: But I don't care! :D I'm gonna rant here! (; Sighs...
Last year everyone was still talking about what we were going to be in ten years' time (: Everyone was so... carefree. And I remembered that we all promised that we would never drift apart, we would never change, we were going to stay best friends forever. Then why is everything so different this year? Why this year no matter how hard I try there just seems to be this invisible wall between me and everyone else...?! Sometimes I really just want to have one friend who I can wholeheartedly trust with my entire life. I just want to meet that one friend who promises she'll always be there and always will be.
It's not really about us growing up, there's just something about the way people look at each other now. Last time... I don't know everyone was just able to look straight into one another's eyes but now... There just seems to be this element of doubt I've never seen before. Like our promises and wishes in the past are no longer as magical and guranteeable as they used to be.
I really just wish that this time-turning machine could ferry me on and take me back to the past so I could treasure everything I had then so much more. We never realise what we lose until the precise moment we lose it and getting it back is twice as hard as reaching out to it in the first place.
So this year, I'm gonna treasure everything I have (: Starting from now! :D
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